Cindy - Whichever route you choose, so long as you’re both happy with the decision, that’s what matters

Hershey - To be honest, my surname has been a constant source of grief for me throughout my life so I always thought that I’d look forward to changing my name…it’s only in the past few years I’ve thought about what it means and changed my mind

Wesa - I have no problem with women changing their names, my only problem is when men have the expectation that women will of COURSE change to their name once the nuptials are over… I agree that it is a woman’s choice and it is her choice that should be accepted by all!

I guess all in all, it is the woman’s choice and any reason she gives should be accepted by society.

I can understand why a couple might want to share the same surname after marrying but you don’t see men offering to switch, do you? M and I (semi-jokingly) talked about both changing our surnames to a one-word hybrid of our current ones, but ultimately he wouldn’t do it. (The fact that we were only "engaged" for 5 weeks played its part in truncating these discussions.) He is stuck on keeping his name for reasons that he can’t explain, and consequently he never expected me to change mine. I appreciate that sense of equality, but have been frustrated by his lack of flexibility. I think these are signs of the times we grew up in - he had never been confronted with the ‘choice’ until he was 25 and marrying opinionated ol’ me, yet the "will I or won’t I?" option has always been there for me as a female growing up in 1980s/1990s Australia.

There are no kids on the horizon but if they ever appear, I’ll be staking my name claim on them for sure! Maybe I’ll dust off that hybrid surname, or we could choose an entirely new one for all of us?

I know a man who took his wife’s surname as there were no males in line to carry on the surname. She is Chinese, he is Caucasian.

I know a couple who’s children have their mother’s surname - which she retained. I know another couple with two kids, who have given her surname to one and his to the other.

I know a blended family where none of the four kids have the same surname.

I met Mr Stickyfingers in my thirties. By then I identified strongly with my name and my career was well established under that moniker. Changing it would have required too much rigamarole by that stage of my twenties.

Today in the papers there is a discussion of discouraging the use of the terms husband and wife in schools. I think it is just further indication of the deconstruction of tradition, language and religion in modern western society.

Basically we have the right to choose what fits our lives the best and over time breaking with tradition will be more accepted and eventually the norm.