Goodbye cancer sticks, hallo twitchy mouth!

So, I’ve decided to officially quit smoking. True, I haven’t really smoked since coming down with this infection last week, but making it official means that I’m not going to carry around any cigs/lighters and try going cold turkey. Oooh, scary! Why so scary? Because I started smoking from the age of 15 - as a social thing, when my ’sohn-bae-del’ (older friends) took me out to pool halls to smoke, drink and play pool. By the time I was 16, I was back living in Australia without my family and had become a regular smoker, changing from Marlboro Reds (16) to Marlboro Lights (12) so that my throat wouldn’t hurt so much from the increase in quantity.

By the time I hit 2nd year uni, I was a pack-a-day smoker who also had a bit of a caffiene addiction (4-5 cups a day), not to mention the love of alcohol which saw me do extremely…odd things. Never dangerous or really self-destructive, but odd. The whole ‘flashing the girls to a room full of people, then cupping them and dancing around making a song about them’ incident is one that either myself or those who witnessed it are likely to forget. Thank god I only speak to one person who was in that room, the others have become blurred faces in the back of my mind.

Last year, I did quit the cigs for almost 2 months…and then an extremely stressful period at work saw me start the habit again, which, though it made me feel like I had no conviction, helped me to retain my sanity. To this point, I’d reduced the number of cigarettes I smoked to about 3-5 on a daily basis, though I’d easily go through a pack if out for a night of drinks. Ahhh, alcohol. I rarely drink these days, but when I do, my right hand and my mouth starts craving the ritualistic process of smoking. Shall I be able to resist this time? I’m not going to be too hard on myself - if I find it too difficult, then I’ll let myself have a few whilst out, but only then.

I’ve spent the last 9 years of my life with a cigarette in hand, and I’m only 24. That’s over a third of the years I’ve been alive. I really don’t want to give any more of my life to these bloody cancer sticks.